Sad Little Me

Submitted by Chris Webster on Sun, 2007/04/08 - 08:12

And then there is me, sad little me, living in a dream, staring out the window, never again to find love. With Jason I thought I’d finally played my cards right, and now I’m just one more of those broken, sad people out there, figuring out a year in advance where they can have Easter and Christmas dinner without feeling like a burden or duty to others, cursing the quality of modern movies because it’s so hard to fill weeknights with movies when they’re all crap, and waiting, just waiting, for those three drinks a night to turn into four – and then, well, I’ll be applying my makeup in the morning, combing my hair, washing my clothes, but it’s not really for anyone. I’m alive, but so what.

Douglas Coupland

Hey Nostradamus!

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Everyday, I leave home with my suit, handbag, entrance badge at 7:15am acting like a working professional. In the dark cold evening, I get into the most crowded bus heading home and most of the time I cannot help sleeping on the bus. Nothing interesting ever happens, even without any changes, We don’t have a uni-WC, we don’t have fun colleagues to work with, we don’t have any laughters around us in the small office. Sometimes I even think that I should take up smoking so that I could get out of the office smoking and chat with others.

In my spare time, I escape from home, wondering around in this cosmopolitan city, travelling abroad or to other places within the country hoping to get away from the work, the past , most of all myself. However, after years, all my old issues fell more real than ever. It seems that nothing changed except for the surroundings. like what Carrie said in “sex and the city”, I couldn’t help wondering, no matter how far I travel or how much I run from it, can I ever really escape from my past? Can I really escape from all my problems? If I was the one who had the key to my escape, I could continue to escape to the furthest place in the world or I could move on and figure them out myself.

Do I have the courage to confront myself? Do I have the confidence to look into my future? God only helps those who can help themselves. Am I fully prepared to save myself? Sad little me….....